I'm tired..

These days, I have finally settled down to have a few thoughts running through my head.

In a group of friends, we usually claimed that we are best friends this and that. But the truth, there are some people don't like certain people in the group, some suspect that, some don't want certain people to know the secret, some people even backstab in the group of friends (I'm really good at wtf...)

But, I seriously hate people hiding secrets and things from me. It happened to me often when A told B about certain things, B don't want to tell other best friends in the group, then it became a secret between A and B. We are suppose to be a group of friend, I don't understand why other friends cannot know certain things, why some of them aren't suppose to know. There suppose to be nothing to hide from it.

Sometimes there are things I wanted to know, I wanted to understand, I wanted to concern about my friends. But some people just don't want to tell the truth and making me half known about the problem. I dont understand what's the meaning of "a group of friends" then. If anything also keep in secret, and has the intention to hide it, then the meaning of the whole group of friendship had lost the soul. Sometimes I thought I know my best friends a lot, but it turns out I'm not..

I know I may hinting something, but things running through my head, I think other friends and I are suppose to know. If he/she wants to keep the secret and know the secret as much as they want or he/she thinks that he/she owns the most secret then he/she is the most valuable asset in the group, just be it.. I'm sick of certain times where you don't want to tell me certain things which left me a dumb dumb person.

I am very emo now. I'm in dilemma with a lot of things.
I hate uncertainties, I hate things just aren't going my way, I hate it when I wanted to but I don't know anything..

Currently listening to Scolded by Lee Hyori